"You're Outta Here!" - Managing Conflict on a Project

 I wrote this tip a couplf of years ago. With spring training around the corner I thought this would be a good opportunity to repeat it. Readers of the weekly tips and those people who know me are familiar with my love of baseball. Many however may not be aware that I have been a High School baseball umpire for 18 years. When people I work with discover this they look at me like I'm mad. "So you're telling me that after being yelled at all day as a project manager you willingly go to a ball field and get yelled at by coaches and parents?" The answer is yes, I love it! In baseball the umpire has the final say as he / she can eject a coach or player if their arguments become overzealous. I will admit that early in my umpiring career my arguments with coaches resembled those famous scenes of Leo Durocher kicking chalk on a major league umpire. As time has passed I have learned a lot about handling these situations better to avoid throwing coaches out whenever possible.

 As project managers we don't have the ability to throw somebody out. However, many of the techniques I have learned on the field can be applied to the everyday project world. So when dealing with conflict, keep the following in mind:

1.   Watch your body language. As umpires we are taught to stand erect with our hands at our side when talking to coaches. Crossing your arms, slouching etc will tell the other person you don't want to listen or don't care.

2.   Control your language and tone of your voice. If the other person raises their voice, don't raise yours. That will only escalate the argument. Pick your words carefully when responding.

3.   Acknowledge what the other person says to show you are listening. Look for common ground in the discussion. Make sure the other person has concluded their comments before you explain your position.

4.   If the conflict occurs during a meeting or in a public area, suggest that you meet in private to discuss the issue. If the discussion is heated, suggest meeting later to provide a cooling off period.

Leo Durocher once said, " I've never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight , yes." Keep this in mind when dealing with conflict. You and the other person may not agree but you are both trying to accomplish the same thing, a successful project. If you treat others as professionals they will do likewise and you will both solve the issue together.